WHAT IT MEANS TO BE IN LOVE WITH THE WRONG PERSON

 As singles and married couples, you are to deliberately work things out in your relationship or marriage and with the help of the Holy Spirit.

In a relationship and or marriage, you are to work things out. A relationship or courtship does not lead to marriage automatically, you are to work things out in your disposition, attitude and reactions. A marriage does not just succeed; you are to work things out between yourselves.

Now there are some couple combinations that are sure to crack along the way. When you find yourself in these spots, you need to seek help prayerfully and with a lot of wisdom to address the lurking issues. Here are those combinations:

1. Two people who are unbelievers

Two people who are unbelievers may love themselves, may be committed to each other, but when the storms of life come, they will fight their battles alone and you know, some of those battles can be very fierce.

They will not have God’s support since they don’t have a relationship with God. They will not have the benefit of son ship and it can be very intense! They need to connect with God!

2. Two people who are believers but refuse to grow

The second group of couples are those who may be believers but whose minds are not renewed. The only thing is that they already have a relationship with God, but apart from that, they are still carnal.

They still do their stuffs like unbelievers would do. They still want to have fun in forbidden areas and they still want to explore the perverse, which would often come with dire consequences.

My advice for couples in this group is that they seek help as soon as possible.

3. Two people where one is born again and the other is not

Here is another scenario that doesn’t always play out well, except with a lot of patience, prayers and perseverance. I always advise singles, don’t think of getting married to someone who doesn’t have a relationship with God.

It would always be filled with challenges that you might have to fight alone, because you are not agreed on your choice of weapons.

It can be frustrating while one is praying, the other is clubbing.

You want to pray, but he or she thinks you are just being fanatical. That can be very disconcerting, to say the least.

It is always a good combo when both are agreed and are going in the same direction in terms of belief systems and practices.

If they both married as unbelievers and then one gets born again first, the one is to pray for the salvation of the other patiently until he or she is saved as well.

4. Two people who are sentimental

When two people who are sentimental get married, their lives will be devoid of principles that are meant to keep them focused and energetic in their marriage and home.

Two sentimental people will always judge a situation from sentimental point of view rather than principles. In no time, they can ruin themselves because you cannot go very far living and swimming in the ocean of sentiments.

They would not be able to achieve much because they would have excuses for their mediocre lifestyles.

5. Two people who are often uncontrollably angry 

Two angry people in a relationship and marriage cannot go far. See the scriptures:

Make no friendship with an angry man; and with a furious man thou shalt not go: Lest thou learn his ways, and get a snare to thy soul (Proverbs 22:24-25 KJV)

The scripture here advises that you should not get involved with somebody that has anger problems and who refuses to work at it.

An angry man can take a knife or gun one day and end it all. An angry wife can ruin things in seconds.

Take a look at the Message Translation:

Don't hang out with angry people; don't keep company with hotheads. Bad temper is contagious–– don't get infected (Proverbs 22:24-25 Message)

6. Two people who are deceptive

Another dangerous combo is ‘two people who are deceptive.’ They both operate under delusion of grandeur. They tell themselves lies and refuse to confront each other.

They sweep things under the carpet and live under illusions. They deliberately flout God’s principles hoping that somehow things will work out.

Everybody around them wonders why they can’t see the obvious. They are unapproachable and unreachable. But the scripture is very clear:

Be not deceived; God is not mocked: for whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap. (Galatians 6:7 KJV)

No matter how we pretend, we cannot mock God. You can do all of that with humans, but not with God. At the end of the day, it is not worth it wasting time on what would not work.

7. Two people who are unforgiving

Lastly, two people who refuse to forgive one another easily can block the blessings of God in their marriage, home and life.

Bitterness of heart is a blessing blocker. If one of the couple is forgiving and praying for the other, it can be easier in resolving the issues, but when both parties are hurt and bitter from time to time, they are not helping themselves, they are not helping their home and of course, the inflow of God’s blessings and favour will be truncated.

Looking diligently lest any man fail of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up trouble you, and thereby many be defiled; (Hebrews 12:15 KJV)

Root of bitterness in a marriage will eventually spring up and get everybody including children defiled.

The way out

So what do you do? Seek help. Don’t keep quiet and watch things degenerate. Re-connect to God and pray a lot.

Seek wisdom from pastors or mentors. Seek to understand your spouse and see how he or she is thinking to have the right perspective.

I pray concerning every storm in your relationship and or marriage today, be still in Jesus name! I speak the peace of God, Shalom, not missing, nothing broken over you and yours in Jesus name!